THERE'S NO REASON TO LOVE

Would you like to marry you knowing your bad manners, laziness, unkempt hair and body odor, wrong attitude of soaking clothes for days without washing them? Would you like to marry your bad breathe,” Pot belly”, big head, ill condition, lack of money and disrespectful manner? Check your product carefully before you sell it. Again, would you like to marry you?

Love requires that you love yourself first before seeking for love. You cannot genuinely love another if you don’t love yourself enough. If you love yourself, you’ll be good to yourself and then to others. Then, you will be loved.

Well, I hear you say; “I love myself anyhow” so why don’t you love someone else anyhow? Why do you expect someone to love you anyhow while you don’t? I think that is selfishness and I’m sure you agree with me.

Ladies have so many checklist for marriage; he must be tall, handsome, wealthy, cool, intelligent and with soft manner. I hear you say, “before who doesn’t like good thing?” But most ladies with these placards of criteria are complete opposite of these qualities. They want a good man but they are on the other side.

Men are not exceptional in this. They also have reasons to love. She must be beautiful with “figure 8” curve, intelligent and smart, among others. For Christians, anyone that must be a life partner must be God-fearing. I love this one.

But this is what I have to ask; would you still love this fellow if you no longer see the qualities that got you involved in marriage?

Don’t say, I will manage because marriage is meant to be enjoyed and not endured. It was designed to be blissful not the opposite.

Hear this, any reason you attached to loving someone is lust. Lust is the desire to have something. You only desire to have what you saw or what you think about the person. Lust is not love.  In this context, it is the strong desire to have an emotional relationship with another.

Lust is connected to feeling and feeling is just an emotion. Emotion is not love. It is the effect of chemical reaction in the body. Some medical experts said that chemicals change every five seconds in the body. This is why after having pre-marital sex for five minutes; partners hate each other for weeks without any cause because the chemical that produces that effects (feeling) has changed. Don’t love someone by the reaction of adrenaline. This could be called infatuation, not love. We must be careful what we call love. When the reason for lusting after the person is no longer there, we hate the fellow.

Love does not have “because “. You don’t say because your partner is not wealthy again or that he/she is too fat or ugly now, “he/she wasn’t like that the time I met him/her”.

Many are suffering from heartbreaks because they’re living in the world of reasoning not loving. You may have reason to be attracted to someone but you can never have reason for loving the fellow. Just as to err is human and to forgive (which is a virtue in love) is divine; to have any reason to love is human while to truly love is divine. Reasons lead to attraction; attraction gives birth to feeling (emotion) and feelings beget physical or bodily touch; touch eventually culminates to sex and after 5 minutes, the feeling is gone and you’re back to reality “oh no! Why did I do it?” You were lusting not loving. Courtesy of reasoning about his/her qualities and personalities.

Why do you love God? Let me help you; because He’s your Lord and Saviour, because He’s your Protector, because He’s your Healer and because He’s your Provider. Honey! If you love God with” because”, you don’t really love Him. What happens the day you no longer experience healing, provisions and protection, you’ll curse God to His face? May be you should ask “Father Job” how he loved. He loved like Love.

You ask “but bro. William, this is marriage we‘re talking about oh?” Where else should we talk about Love if not mainly in a relationship called marriage? You cannot love your spouse genuinely if you don’t love God supremely.

Love does not have limit. It is not measured. Love does not have an end (1Cor.13:8). Man could be dynamic; can experience some form of changes but love does not change because love is God and God is love (1Jn.4:8; 16). Another name for God is love. God Himself is love. You cannot have love without God and you cannot have God without love. Everything you can find in God, you can find in love and whatever you can find in love, you can find in God. When you say “I love you”, you are directly saying “I God you” which means “I see you as God sees you”.

I believe that the only reason to love is LOVE (God); not beauty, not shape, not height, not wealth, not qualification, not religion and not tribe.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Now you got me. “There is a reason to love after all” No! Get this message right. If the only reason why you love a person is God Who is Love, then there is no reason at all for loving the person or your partner. Love says “love your enemy”. What reason do you have for loving your enemy? While you are still thinking about that.

  

Look, any moment you quarrel or have misunderstanding with your partner, you become enemy to each other, but love says “don’t even wait for your partner to apologize, forgive and love even more”. Now, that’s tough. Isn’t it? Well, you can call it “tough love”. But that’s what true love demand. If you’re not experiencing this in your relationship, think again. You don’t look at the other person whether he/she is doing same. It’s personal. 

Love flows from within to without. It comes from the spirit man to the physical. It is natural. If it is not God, it can’t be love.

GRAB A COPY OF THIS BOOK FOR YOUR READING PLEASURE